Pasadena Ladies Tea

Had a wonderful weekend! Saw some new and old friends at the Tea that Pasadena threw!  Lisa took nine of us to the spa for a massage..it was incredible! I really needed the time of refreshing.

Previous entry..

From my blog June 7, 2008

The blackness has fallen. How long this time?



Even medicine doesn't lift the unbearable weight. One day flying at 100 mph..the next screeching to a halt. All movement like molasses. Can't function can't move. All around overwhelms and the tears stream...flowing, drenching. Then the numbness.


Nothing is as it was, but I've been here before..this cycle nothing new to me. Since the first big surge of estrogen I've ridden this ride. up and down up and down up and down. It's different when your children look at you and know you have to move...have to care for something..have to feed clothe wash maintain. Before children I found a hole and didn't come out until I could fake it...fake it, fake it..fake it. My whole life has been manic or fake it.


I need help.

Wow, have things changed! I haven't felt that veil of sadness for a very long time.  Why was I so frightened to start the drugs??  It makes me mad that people vilify meds these days..especially phycotropic drugs! And if you plan to help your children with these meds, people think it's child abuse!!

Anyway, my point is this...if you ever feel like I did when I posted that blog..SEEK MEDICAL ADVISE! Life is so much more than living that way..help is out there! Don't waste another minute!

Autism heartbreak...

I remember in the beginning I was heartbroken so much of the time...more because I didn't understand what Autism was...and I could not console Isaac.  As we were enveloped in the Autism community I began to feel strong and hopeful.  We started to see such incredible progress it was exciting.  Even as a community we see awareness levels rising and Autism is spoke of in main stream social activities. 

Then something happens like what happened in the Moreno Valley library that smacks a MAMA front and center in the face.  It wasn't a huge ordeal, but the attitude from the librarians and security guard surprised me so much.  Isaac found a corner while I was checking out the books and was spinning while looking up at the ceiling.  It's just something he does.  He wasn't upset or stressed, he just likes to spin.  The security guard came up to me and told me that he was exhibiting "odd" behavior and needed me to watch him more carefully. WTHeck..OK..."Isaac, come stand by mommy."  I turn back to the books.."Maam, you should wash your children's faces before you go out in public.." Isaac used a sharpie to draw a mustache on himself this afternoon and I've tried..believe me, I've tried. This time she just got a dirty look from me...Now I just ignored her.

We get all the way done and are out the door..BEEP BEEP BEEP!!! The detector beeped and the librarian yelled STOP!!! OK??? We turn around and the librarian yells to the guard, "THAT one went under the rope!!" pointing to Isaac...I say (in a very sarcastic way), "Lady! Here are the books and here is the receipt."  She says, "It is very serious that your child walked under that rope!" She scolded Isaac very harshly and he started to cry.  I rolled my eyes and walked out..

Ok here is my dilemma...I understand that we have to advocate and educate the world at large...we are expected to raise our families, struggle to pay for therapies, build up our marriages, encourage our other children...and HAVE TO EDUCATE STUPID PEOPLE! 

I can also feel this overwhelming struggle when we deal with society as a whole...they present us with a box.  It has certain dimensions and they expect every child to fit into it...then they throw drugs and discipline at both the kids and the parents to bend (even pop) joints out of place to fold inside the box....

I wholehearted admit that my children are weird (look at their parents).  They are not like other kids.  They are foolish, childish, playful, and expressive.  They are not the kind of children to excel at one particular skill.  When we walk into a place all together it can be kind of daunting.

But they know they are loved.  They have experienced sand in their underwear and paint in their hair.  They are free to make their own PBandJ and I've never cut up their apples (eat it whole or you get none).  They have hammered real nails with real hammers.  They have been read aloud to everyday of their lives.  They have watched and journaled a pumpkin from seed to 20lbs.  They have baked a cake and burned themselves with the glue gun. 

SO we are weird you big fat world....but to be honest...I LIKE IT THAT WAY!

Creative Play

Maybe it's the sunshine...maybe it's the birds chirping...whatever the reason, I'm feeling a creative flow that cannot be quieted.  Here are a few ideas we are going to do this coming week.  Wanna come and play?

I wish they would stay little.  I'm having so much fun!

Enjoy today...

Make a memory with your children,
Spend some time to show you care;
Toys and trinkets can't replace those
Precious moments that you share.
Money doesn't buy real pleasure,
It doesn't matter where you live;
Children need your own attention,
Something only you can give.
Childhood's days pass all too quickly,
Happy memories all too few;
Plan to do that special something,
Take the time to go or do.
Make a memory with your children,
Take the time in busy days;
Have some fun while they are growing,
Show your love in gentle ways.

- Elaine Hardt -

Lovely Weekend

Had such a fun time at Sonia's this weekend.  She is a great hostess.  Everyone made memories watching the Superbowl, eating great food, playing at the park, playing football, swimming, and attending a concert! So very fun...we all made memories.  I was watching the kids play at the park with their cousins. We are lucky to be back here in Southern California with them.  The kids were playing pirates and everyone had an important role.  Izzy was delegating jobs to them all...she told me to be the protector and I had to carried the big sword.  Scotty impressed me with his attention to details when it came to design of the playground equipment.  He noticed that the slide and the climbing wall were really the same piece just flipped over...impressive!  And of course our Luke seems to ALWAYS make a new friend where ever we go.  He and his buddy dug some elaborate tunnels that all interconnected.  I loved watching all the adult cousins playing football and remembering when they were young.

The boys and I spent the night and in the morning we headed over to the Y so the kids could swim and we could drink in the sunshine.  I count every second together with Sonia as priceless.  She is my bestie and I thank God for her friendship.  I can talk to her about ANYTHING and I love her as much as my sister.  Got back to the house just in time to have lunch with Esther and Barbara Coffman (an absolute pioneer in the homeschooling world and a wealth of information on parenting and marriage). It was a treat to be able to visit with her!

We met Nancy and Tia, Veronica and her kiddos at the Mariners Church in Irvine for the taping of Jana Alayra's newest DVD and it was awesome.  We were in the front and I'm certain our kids will be on the DVD....as close as we get to being famous! :)  Luke of course made another new friend there and talked with her they whole ride home in the car! So much for homeschooling kids being antisocial!! HA!

After the concert we met at the Irvine Spectrum for supper before heading home..not much traffic and we could use the carpool lane....

We are blessed!

relaxed learning

I think I'm going to used "relaxed learning" instead of homeschooling.  I think it fits us nicely. We have been doing fun things in the last few weeks.  It feels like the kind of school experience I've been dreaming about for the last few years.  Sunshine, movement, family, conflict resolution, reading, playing, cooking, sewing, reading, adding, carrying, conjugating, reading.....:)

"A child educated at a school is an uneducated child."~ George Santazana

Christmas Time

Bugdeting/Simplifying

With the new year drawing close, I have our family's budget in mind.  Having 6 mouths to feed I think I need to start buying in bulk.  So this past week I've been researching and crunching numbers.  It seems that Walmart's store brand beats out places like Costco and Sam's Club for dried goods like beans, rice, pasta,and baking supplies. 


Here is a new recipe I found for Laundry detergent that costs 5cents a load:


2 cups Borax
2 cups sodium bicarbonate (cleaning strength baking soda)
1/2 bar of finely grated Zote soap (you can sub any bar soap)


Only 1 T. is enough per load!


For my dishwashing detergent:


2 cups Borax
2 cups sodium bicarbonate (cleaning strength baking soda)


Use 2 T.


For sparkling dried dishes, fill the little place you would usually pour Jet-Dry with vinegar instead...It works great!!


Starting in the new year I plan to break my weekly chores up differently to try and save money and time.


Monday-Laundry
Tuesday-Shopping
Wednesday-Baking ALL good for 1 week and freezing things.
Thursday-Cooking for the week
Friday-Deep clean house, prepare for Shabbat
Saturday-Shabbat
Sunday-Lord's Day


For Baking day:


5 yeast loaves bread
2 pizza dough
3 quick breads (pumpkin, banana, zucchini, nut)
24 corn muffins
24 apple muffins
3 dozen no-bake cookies
4 dozen oatmeal cookies
2 quarts Homemade ice cream
Pre-make 5 dozen pancakes (boys pull from freezer and pop in toaster)


For Cooking day:


Soak/Boil rice, pasta, beans to have on hand.
Two different large pots of soup (divided and frozen).
Chop and prep all veggies.
Anything to make nightly prep easier.

Hope to make a dent in our grocery money by homemaking things instead of buying the quicker options. And if I buy the bulk things at the beginning of the month, I'll stay out of the grocery store and not buy last minute things I don't need.

Staying connected with good friends

So we have finally connected Luke with his best friend Zach in Kennewick.  Zach has a computer in his room and the two of them spent the afternoon "playing" games together.  Luke snuggled into his bed with my laptop and you wouldn't know there was a screen keeping the two apart.  It is a blessing the two can stay connected.  Zach and Luke both have a brother with high functioning autism.  I believe Zach and Luke share an enormous capacity for patience and compassion. The two share similar frustrations, too.  I'm so glad Luke has found such a friend so early in his life.  Because they are both home schooled, it will be a great incentive to finish up schoolwork to have a play date with each other...:0) not to mention that his mom is one of my all time best friends forever...I missing her greatly at the moment..but we, too, have plans to make our yogi tea and sit and talk like the good old days...although I'll miss her neighbors plenitude of garden goods and the out grown clothing..it will be just as good as long as I get a glimpse of a naked Abbey running around in the background :) I love the Brooks and I'm thankful for Skype to keep us together..oxoxox

Better Than A Hallelujah Amy Grant

My name is Eva and I'm a www.stumbleupon.com addict..

My friend Marie-Eve mentioned in one of her blogs about this site.  I check it out! BOOM!! I'm hooked..a homeschooling paradise! You go from quotes by Nietzsche to art history to buttons that make farting noises!! We also checked out huge toothpick sculptures that we are going to try and make.  Move over math and reading...we are going to submerge ourselves in toothpicks and Elmer's glue!! Can not wait for Monday!


In other news, Sergio is sick. Always the last to get stuff..Fever and sore throat.  Thankfully he has tomorrow to sleep in and relax..poor guy!

Isaac made some major progress in sharing his feelings today.  While watching The Polar Express, he told me that the part when the conductor punches the children's tickets makes him want to cry because they all learned what they needed to learn...pretty big stuff for a kid who "shouldn't" (because of autism) be caring about how others feel. Earlier this morning he was telling me how lucky he feels to have brothers..he said he always has a friend to play with.  These children are teaching me more than I can ever teach them..

Oh, another fun thing today, I got to talk with my Mom, Aunt Debbie, Macy, and J.R on Skype.  Can I tell you how much I love THAT..Macy looked and looked! I miss her so much.  I love technology!

Matt Maher - Hold Us Together